Guilt and Forgiveness

by Jeanne McDonald



When arriving home Alice was waiting in the driveway for us. While parking the car in the garage, Jasper was thinking, "She knows!" I knew he was right. Besides seeing the disappointed look on her face I also got the screaming thought from Alice of "How could you let this happen Edward!" It's not like I had done it on purpose. I didn't go seeking humans for Jasper to hunt. It just simply happened. The bad thing was she was more upset with me then she was with Jasper. Even though she seen everything that occurred, she felt like I should have taken more precautions.

Maybe she was right. I honestly don't know. We got out of the car and she flew into Jasper's arms. She comforted him while the entire time mentally scolding me. I was starting to get really upset. The whole point of this trip was to get my mind off things and instead I come back to being in more trouble then I was worth. However getting upset would get me no where and I knew it. She loved Jasper and it was easier to blame me then it was to blame him.

We got inside the house and everyone was there. Jasper was accepted back with no qualms as to what happened. Emmett made his usual jokes, Rosalie had her usual superior scowl and Carlisle and Esme immediately forgave the incident. While he still felt the guilt of what he did, it seemed much easier now that everyone, especially Alice, had forgiven him so easily. I could hear Carlisle's encouraging thoughts for me not to worry about this and there was nothing I could have done to prevent this. I knew he was proud of how I took care of Jasper when he needed me most. I could also hear Esme's pride & concern for both of us in her thoughts.

I admit I envy Jasper at times. I wish I could be lucky enough to find someone who could love me so unconditionally the way Alice does him. What am I thinking? I'm a monster. There is no one for me.

Well I'm off to catch up on homework. Tomorrow will be the first day back to school since the accident. Maybe something interesting will happen.
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